People have lost their confidence in being able to think for themselves, after years of interruption, or being told what to think, believe and how to feel, people have lost the subtle art of thinking for themselves, i know this because i lost the art of thinking for myself years ago.

We are constantly bombarded with subtle messages via the media telling us how we should be thinking, should be wearing, what we should be doing, how to act what we need to purchase to fit in.

When you really think about it, how much of your own thinking do you actually take any notice of? 

Think of a time you had an issue, you have thought about it a lot in private, you have come to a decision in your head, you feel comfortable, you think you have come to the best decision for you. You then share your thoughts or run your thinking with another person, but they have a different viewpoint based on what “they think you should do” you start to reasons with their thinking and compromise your own and before you know it you are heading down a path you didn’t really want to go down?

If more people started thinking for themselves and stopped seeking approval from other’s and took more risk’s based on their own thinking, can you imagine no longer needing to seek the other persons approval about what you are thinking or feeling. You have the self confidence to trust your own thoughts? 

You can seek advice and be offered some potential solutions but ultimately the final decision has to be yours and one you feel comfortable making. 

Now I am not saying that you discount the other persons thinking, it may well be that they have considered something that you hadn’t taken into account and if that’s the case, then go back and #haveanotherwordwitheesen and do some more thinking.

Before you seek out the opinions of others, try to work out who in your circle really supports your own thinking oppose to those who are more likely to do your thinking for you. 

So for example in my case, I have a small select group of friends who I feel I can share my thoughts and think without fear, they may well offer advice but ultimately they will respect and support any decision I make and support whatever the outcome, positive or negative!

I then have other friend’s or should I say associates who will listen, offer advice (based on their thinking), if I ignore their advice and the outcome goes pear shaped they are the ones who would be more likely to say “I told you so” or “you should have listened to me!” don’t those people fucking annoy you?

The point is, its not about whos right or wrong, we are all going to make bad decisons in our lives and have to face the consequences, but at least they are our own, we have to be willing to take a risk and start listening to ourselves instead of allowing others to do our thinking for us. Now I am not saying that this is easy, after all, we have all been programmed over the years to allow others to do our thinking for us, so undoing it, will take time, and it will take practice.

But I truly believe that taking a step back, allowing yourself time to think and reflect, and learning to trust your own thinking is so important, after all everything we do starts with our thinking, if our thinking is good our decisions are good, if our decision are good then out actions are good, if our actions are good them our outcomes are good. 

Reet thats enough thinking and reflection I have got a job to go too

Love Fordy

4 thoughts on “#Haveawordwitheesen

  1. Brilliant and so relevant Tracey! I’m always seeking approval and it stops me being ME! Thanks for this x

  2. So very true ,I have learned that lesson ,it has taken years to trust my own judgement, always has somebody else tried to tell me what they think is best

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