I hadn’t seen or spoken to dad three years before he came back into my life. At the time, I couldn’t work how I was unable to turn my back on him and walk away. It felt like there was a constant battle between my heart and mind, and I could not find a truce. […]
Category: Co-dependancy
Dear Dad
Your addiction came out of the blue I never saw it coming There were times I felt like running But I couldn’t and I didn’t To stay or to walk away My decision varied every day One day I’d be standing my ground And the next my resolve could not be found Even the days […]
Why I will never stop talking about Addiction
Today marks the end of National Alcohol awareness Week, I’ve done my bit (I hope) shared some snippets of my personal experience of being at the harsh end of alcoholism. It’s been years since I was in the thick of my own addiction and drowning in my attempts to rescue dad from his. We can […]
A Modern-Day Fairy Tale
A True Story He called it love But it didn’t feel like love to her To the outside world He was the perfect guy It was like he could walk on water But unbeknown to her She was just another lamb to the slaughter Like butter wouldn’t melt She had to disguise how she really […]
The therapeutic act of writing
For years after Dad’s death, I would often dream of Dad. Unfortunately, most felt more like nightmares. The most common one was that he was alive, but I could never work out how? The memories of his burial would be clear as day in my mind, stood by his grave, throwing in a single red […]
If you thought living with someone misusing substances is tough, spare a thought for those who have lost someone to substance abuse.
According to statistics, up to three people are adversely affected by one person’s substance misuse. But I know it is far more. It’s been over fifteen years since I lost my father to alcoholism, and it still affects me to this day. It is especially hard when I hear about another person, someone I know […]
End of care for problematic substance misuse – Who decides?
Caring for Dad during the end stages of his Alcoholism has to be one of the most traumatic experiences I had ever done through, even my brush with addiction couldn’t have prepared me or my sister for this journey we were about to embark on. The more I write about Dad and his story, the […]
“Help me up, I’m going for a pint” – The dark side of Alcoholism
Asking someone to consider stopping using drink or drugs, can be like asking a child to give up their comfort blanket. Dealing with the tantrums and denial was exhausting. Unfortunately, Dads comfort blanket ended up suffocating him. “Help me up, I’m going for a pint” These were the words from a 55 years old man, […]
Life after caring – The void
Writing is my therapy, it’s my escape, a place to think, without interruption. Particularly lately what with the incessant negative news and views about society, COVID, BLM the economy, sometimes it’s easy to forget that amongst all these issues is that there are still millions of people who are afflicted by addiction, but that […]
Families & Friends of Addicts Coming Together
To stay or Walk away, that is the million-dollar question? Families can often feel like bystanders watching in dismay as the addict’s actions and behaviours change, turning their loved ones into someone they barely recognise. I can still hear my mother share how she felt in a film (Putting it into words) made by families […]
