Personal development is part of human nature- going back to basics

I love teaching and facilitating groups, I started out running workshops whilst working at Kickback a day rehabilitation program for people addicted to substances. I love seeing peoples faces when “the penny has dropped” when they might have recognised, lets say “a limiting belief” that they had carried around with them for neons, that has been suffocating their self esteem,  or when they start seeing themselves in a different light, being able to unravel and make sense of who they are and how they got to where they were at, exploring and trying/adopting new strategies that make sense to them, seeing them putting their new knowledge into practice and moving forward with their lives. PRICELESS

I ran the basic counseling courses at Sheffield college, where attendees had aspirations of being counselors but what they didn’t realise was that the very basics of learning to be a counsellor you must first understand yourself, what makes you tick? being mindful about your own thoughts, developing your own strategies for helping others is “essential” and quite often I see soooo many people in the caring field who put the needs of others before themselves. 

So I am excited to announce that I have been collaborating with my good friend Mick Holmes on designing some workshops. We are going back to basics, using some of our shared learning (personal and professional) over a combined 50+ years of working with others but more importantly working on ourselves and are going to be sharing it in our own unique, no nonsense, jargon free workshops.

As you get older, it is all too easy to get in a rut – with fixed viewpoints, stuck emotions, ways of being that others can see clearly but you just think are ‘right’ and continue to use your safe solutions.

All too often we perceive that our personal development has already ended by the time we reach adulthood. After all, we’ve ‘grown up’ and know enough to hold down a job and if we are fortunate we find our niche and as much as possible solve the problems of survival, then we stick with those solutions, GREAT! But thats not everyone!

Resisting new experiences, taking less interest in new things, or ignoring something new or uncomfortable will keep you locked in your comfort zone, and as you get older, your comfort zone gets smaller and smaller. But in a society forever changing, with so many expectations it can be hard to maintain and the danger is that you can find yourself isolated, left behind, feeling like you have nothing to give, nothing of value! Which is of course BULLSHIT! 

This is harmful because you not only stop doing things that scare you, but you also stop doing things that give you pleasure and the opportunity to find out new things about yourself. A natural trait of humans is to be constantly developing, growing and moving toward a balanced and mature way of being, but yet this is surpassed, ignored way too often. Who we are is determined by who and what we have been and by the person we strive to become. The goal of personal development is to learn and apply what we know about ourselves which will enables us get closer to that mysterious state commonly known as “enlightenment” or a level of “emotional wellbeing”,

Personal development is part of human nature, and yet it is ignored or dismissed as being just for “Hippies” or you are deemed as weak for showing or telling people how you are feeling. It doesnt matter what era or year your were born, It is in our nature to learn and grow, but we are held back by our culture, which is predominantly focused on survival needs, with each of us in competition with others, and our need learn about ourselves is repressed. 

I am for the first time in a long time, excited to have come to the decision to pursue what I love, this isn’t a new career, fuck that I love what I do, call it a hobby? but I have finally given myself permission to pursue something that I truly believe in, something that soothes my soul, helping people grow. 

So on that note, I had better get me ass into gear and get to work, after all the pleasures in life don’t come free! 

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4 thoughts on “Personal development is part of human nature- going back to basics

  1. I’m liking the sound of this venture you and your friend have planned.

    Some ‘adults’ cups are too full to learn anything new, that might actually help them or those around them, in life. Their ego won’t allow it. The need to be right and in control,their fear of change. It is sad really.

    I too have gone from one crisis to another it seems my entire life. I think losing a parent, a mother at that, at age seven, will possibly set a person on that course. All what we know and what makes us feel safe, snatched away from us . Permanently.

    I have worked so hard to change my patterns of behaviour, my choices,without losing my own true essence. Unfortunately our historical decisions haunt us in the guise of those we are without choice, stuck with for the long haul.

    I am no quitter though, and even if others won’t, or can’t change, and want to put me in their unhelpful pigeon holes of who they deem me to be, I’ll carry on learning how to be the best human I can be.

    I’m happy for the arsholes who make life so hard, to change too. I’m all for rising above it, and moving past what has gone before. That is only reserved for those who I am utterly stuck with in this life. For now at least. Not that I forget mind. I don’t do that.

    I’ll keep a look out for updates on your new venture 🙂

    1. You are one of the most self aware and resilient woman i know, and again i love your use of words

    1. Me too steve, 49 years old and only just given myself permission, let me know when the classes start again x

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