I used to get my rush (or high) from Speed, Amphet. It was a rush like nothing I had ever had before, I felt invincible, something I hadn’t felt for years. it was physical, it was emotional. That small bit of white or pink powder could transport me from what was causing me pain and offering a brief respite from the feeling of hopelessness and unhappiness.
But it didn’t last long.
Ask anyone in recovery and they will tell you that most of their lives became consumed with chasing that elusive rush, but it got harder and harder. They will tell you how they still chased that elusive rush or high whilst their lives were unravelling around them and how they still chased that rush despite the consequences. Loss or breakdown in relationships, poor physical and mental health, loss of jobs, homes and even worse their children. Addiction is selfish, it isolates us, it isolated us from loved ones around us, but more importantly, we become isolated and disconnected from ourselves.
Recovery from addiction starts by learning to put down the synthetic highs and replacing them with natural ones. Recovery isn’t just about ridding or detoxing our bodies of the synthetic poison. Recovery is also about detoxing our minds, what we watch, what we listen to, who we listen to and what we read. But more importantly how we talk and listen to ourselves.
So, what is a recovery rush?
I would describe my recovery rush or high comes from listening and reading stories of how people from all walks of life have overcome or come to terms with the very reasons that we turned to substances in the first place. Now my natural rush comes from hearing about how people have overcome adversity and who feel happier in their skin. The special rushes come hearing people talk about newfound self-awareness, watching people deconstruct the physical and emotional walls that they built over the years. It is a privilege to witness the freedom and a sense of relief and recognition that they are deep down worthy of better.
I haven’t yet once met anyone who chose to become addicted, who set out with the intentions of sabotaging themselves, or their families and loved ones. Addiction isn’t a lifestyle choice it is driven by a complex set of internal and external factors both unique to the individual concerned. Addiction’s not a Monday – Friday job, it’s 24/7 its 365 days a year. Once a year, people use September as an opportunity to speak up and share their recovery journeys. Offering hope and inspiration others who might be questioning their own.
I am very proud of Sheffield’s Recovery community, which is rich in diversity but more importantly, it is driven by the people in recovery themselves. Selflessly giving back, offering a listening ear to someone who has felt unheard for years. Its visible recovery at its finest, being surrounded by people may be weeks or even years ahead of you, but who you can look up to as role models. You hear about their recovery journeys and hear similarities in their stories that reflect your own and can feel an instant connection. A safe space to explore painful memories emotions that you have tried to block out for years can start to bubble to the surface, but it ok because you are surrounded by likeminded people who have been through something similar. For many in the recovery community, it’s like finally finding your tribe. A sense of connection and belonging. Sheffield has many tribes (groups) ranging from NA, AA, CA, SMART, ARC, SASS, Kickback and De-hood recovery peer groups. There are also loads of recovery led support services such our treatment providers, Hep C mentors, Shelter, The Greens offer specialist support the list goes on and on.
The key for those in early recovery is finding their own a tribe, or even more than one tribe it doesn’t and shouldn’t matter what tribe you chose, just as long as it works for you. A tribe where you feel connected, a healthy recovery community doesn’t mind about how you became addicted, what you did during, your using, or how long you have been clean, what substances you misused or how many lapses or relapses you have experienced. All that matters is that you are trying, that you are doing your best and trying to learn from past mistakes and are trying to unlearn, old learned behaviours, to become a better version of who you are, a happier version, someone who doesn’t need synthetic external substances to make your ‘feel’ better within your skin.
There are challenges though, whilst it is priceless being around others that can support and inspire we mustn’t start to become dependent on others for our recovery rush. Internal happiness is something we all have to continuously work at don’t lose sight of how to develop your internal recovery rush.
Steps to work on developing your Recovery Rush
- Get into new habits, like doing a daily gratitude list
- Remind yourself that you are worthy of happiness, just like everyone else
- Remember what you have achieved how well you have done
- Even if you haven’t got a lot, be thankful for what you have got
- Continue to develop and work on healthy relationships not just with others, but yourself
- Do the things that make you feel get about yourself that make you happy
- Observe the world around you without being immersed in it.
- Connect with yourself daily
- Start to learn to love the parts of you that for years you have disliked
Sheffield Recovery Community’s main purpose is promoting all the recovery tribes in Sheffield, we don’t favour one over another because each tribe/group offers their own uniqueness.
To find out more about Sheffield Recovery Community you can either go to our FaceBook page or head to Sheffield DACT website to find out more about treatment and if you want to be really inspired head to the Recovery Page to read and listen to some amazing stories
Remember, try not to be afraid of who you truly are, be proud of your recovery and remember, if you would like to subscribe to more posts, please go to https://www.shithappens.me.uk/contact/ and sign up, If you liked the post please share, if you don’t then do nothing and that’s ok too