The only way to overcome pain is to first learn how to bear it.

Someone asked me the other day “so how many followers do you have on your blog” this was after a conversation about why I started the blog, so I explained again that the blog isn’t a platform for getting attention, I have found since having a break from Alcohol I have found myself, underneath the haze of weekend hangovers I have found a love for reflecting and getting some shit off me chest. I dont do it for the applause I do it for the cause – ME

I don’t and won’t and quite frankly have the time or energy to commit to posting my daily antics on here”fuck me I would never have a life”, but I do still every morning make time for me and that has been the best enlighting moment, personal learning for me this year. Don’t get me wrong over the past 6 months I have had to still deal with shit most of it has been my doing, when I say that what I mean is that is just a by-product of work, I love my job, but it ain’t all fairy tales, there are a few downsides too. But the key learning for me has to be being more open and accepting of the challenges opposed to resisting them. Dealing with being a parent and my internal worries can be a constant form of pain and distress. My health hasn’t been great, in fact, I have been wondering if perhaps it hasn’t been great for a whilst but that I just didn’t realize it or have been taking my body, myself for granted?

But I AM learning the best way I can to try and manage it oppose to trying to ignore it. Life is and can be SHIT, lets not sugar coat stuff, so whilst I would love to sit, isolate and write all day long that isn’t a) realistic and b) quite frankly would get boring at some point, after all I would just end up talking about the color of the four walls.

I decided to go back a start to read “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life” by Mark Manson) because quite frankly it’s my kind of book, he doesn’t hold back on is use of language nor his blunt attitude to life, He talks about trying to resist or deny shit parts of your life only creates more pain “struggle is a struggle. The denial of failure is a failure. Hiding what is shameful is itself a form of shame. Pain is an inextricable thread in the fabric of life, and to tear it out is not only impossible, but destructive: attempting to tear it out unravels everything else with it.” here’s some of my other fave quotes/statements from the book.

“The only way to overcome pain is to first learn how to bear it.”

“The avoidance of suffering is a form of suffering.” 

Its the time of year when I am running around like a manic trying to prepare as much as I can for my return to work in the New year, and that’s ok cos it’s like that every year, its nowt new, but I am coping/dealing with it better than previous years. By accepting I have been more prepared and pragmatic about the challenges that have been thrown my way.

That’s me done, its the last day of work for 2018, I still have got plently of shit to plow through, and if I don’t get it all done, that’s ok too. I am sooo looking forward to being able to take the foot off the gas to do some more quality refection and spend more time on me over the Christmas break – who knows, there might be some shitty bits coming my way whilst I am off, but at least I am more prepared and open to embracing shit oppose to trying to avoid it! in the words of Mark Manson – “your not special and you are going to die someday”

So make the fucking most of what you have got !

Love Fordy x

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