Its not what we do, its how we react

Not everything we see our reality, sometimes the person we want to be sometimes isn’t the person we see staring back at us in the mirror. 

I often look in the mirror and don’t recognise the person staring back at me. If I am in a happy place, I like what I see, if I’m not in such a good place I struggle to like the reflection staring back at me. I see people on the streets who carry the burden of low self-esteem with little or no self-worth, but who I see has having sooo much potential, but they cannot see it? 

The only person who can make those changes is the person staring back at us…small steps, hourly, daily, weekly…I’m a firm believer in working towards change, if that’s what you want. But change isn’t easy and it’s not for the faint hearted and it should never be underestimated.

There are days when the shit literally hits the pan some is within our control and some is out of our control and often it can blindside us and hit us out of no where! There are many a time, I can quite easily ignore all the things that are niggling me, let them go, but they never go far, not until I address them anyway 

Sometimes it might be something simple as recognising my feelings have been hurt! 

Other times it might be that I find myself putting something off, a task I need to do, a good one is housework, especially when it comes to the f***ing Ironing! 

Every action creates a reaction just like throwing a pebble into a pond, anything we say or do will be met with either a positive or negative reaction. 

Not all our actions are positive, which increases the risk of a negative reaction.

Some of our actions are positive, which will increase the chances of a positive reaction

Some of our actions, which we perceive as positive can still be met with a negative reaction! 


There will always be two sides to EVERY story, there will always be people with differing opinions, there will always be people with differing beliefs and values, there will always be people who will never see things through your lens, so knowing this…. What are you going to do about it?

Thats life! “So how do we change this?” 

My response would be not how do we change something, it would be “How are we going to respond, How are we going to react?, what can I do? What can YOU do?”

We can start by practising to take a step backgo somewhere quiet, make some quiet time for you, somewhere you wont be distrurbed

Write it down – start by listing all your problems -“What’s bothering you?”  or ask yourself “what do I want?) (what do you desire or wish)  moving them from your head and your heart can help you can see them in a different light or perspective

Once you have finished your list, go through it, prioritise what’s causing you the biggest issue or what’s the top of your wish list?

Get another sheet of paper and write down what’s bothering or what’s your wish on the page, stay on this page and list all the barriers, and issues associated with the problem or wish

Now work through them one on by one ask yourself “what can I do?”

What you might find is that most of what you have listed are actually assumptions and at worse limiting assumptions and that these are the only things that are holding you back!

The key here is to acknowledge what’s going wrong for you or bothering you, break it down, dissect it, come up with a plan to deal with and then DO IT!

Life isn’t always easy, sometime life seems much harder than it has to be, often the only thing that makes it harder is how your react or respond to it! 

Just don’t give up. 

So if you are struggling, have a blip or fall spectacularly. Get up, #HaveaWordwitheesen 

You can do it! You are doing it! You GOT THIS 

One thought on “Its not what we do, its how we react

  1. How very true. We can not change what others do only how we react to their actions. We do have control, even when our lives feel out of control.

    Especially when our own minds conspire against us.

    Observe all that chuffin’ noise and think, what advice would I give to all that gossip my brain thinks is helpful.

    Not today brain, I’m too busy to listen to the inane chatter. If I wanted to watch Jezza on tele I would. I don’t, so I don’t need my own personal horror show to be aired on repeat in my own head. Thanks, but no thanks.

    ‘Turn off your tv and go and do something useful instead’.

    Literal or otherwise 🙂

    However, now I am procrastinating by reading you’re funny and insightful blog, and writing stuff I want to write, as opposed to all the other stuff that ‘NEEDS’ and has to be done!

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