Discovering myself after Substance Abuse It wasn’t until 18 months after coming out of the mental institution from drug-induced psychosis that my recovery or discovery journey truly began. That being said, looking back, I didn’t have the time or the appropriate support at the time. I’d recently left a coercive and controlling relationship. I was […]
Category: My own addiction
It’s time to talk about Menopause and Addiction in the same sentence.
Disclaimer – This isn’t a pity blog but a call to action based on my experience. My Story My periods and mood swings had plagued me for years before I’d started using drugs. My emotions would fluctuate like a frigging swinging pendulum. One minute I could be calm, collected, and rational; the next, I’d transform […]
What’s in your cup
My cup was always half empty In fact, it was bone dry I would carry the weight of the world on my shoulders And held onto resentments the size of boulders I turned to drugs seeking absolution That was until I started searching for different solutions Instead of blaming everyone else and started […]
If they are your mate they’ll wait
I made some amazing friendships during my using/dealing days but one of the most complex parts in my early recovery was stepping away from some of those friendships. This was made worse by knowing that they weren’t bad people; in fact, it was quite the opposite. They never gave up on me when I fucked […]
Don’t wait until it’s too late
At the time of writing this, I don’t feel sad, I feel angry. It’s always sad when you lose someone, it’s part of life, we all go at some point, but every now and then the loss can hit you hard and this loss is no exception. Yesterday I was contacted out of the blue […]
My problem was never about the drugs, it was me all along
People often ask me ‘how would you describe your recovery journey?’ and I always describe my recovery as being’ like a discovery of the self’. It’s taken a lot of soul searching and self-honesty to be the person that I am today. let me take you back… For years I was preoccupied with trying to […]
Befriending and taming my Evil Twin – aka Ego
Imposter syndrome was the topic of conversation at this week’s MMM writing group. I chuckled to myself because she is someone I know well. I would go as far as to say that I used to refer to her as my evil twin, aka my ego. She would be that little voice in my head […]
Pitfalls of Peer Support In Recovery
There is something magical about peer support groups in recovery but beware of the pitfalls. Walking in or logging onto your first support group can feel daunting and scary. But the benefits associated with them far outweigh the negatives. Support groups can be a great place for individuals in early recovery to explore and rebuild […]
The Time I Hit Rock Bottom
At the time I was seeking self-absolution The drugs were a perfect solution I was wrapped up in my own mind The drugs helped me to unwind At the time I really didn’t like myself I felt persecuted by everyone else Deep down I was desperate to feel loved And craved a loving hug I […]
Why I will never stop talking about Addiction
Today marks the end of National Alcohol awareness Week, I’ve done my bit (I hope) shared some snippets of my personal experience of being at the harsh end of alcoholism. It’s been years since I was in the thick of my own addiction and drowning in my attempts to rescue dad from his. We can […]
